My Spiritual Explanation

Since a lot of people generally don't know what spirituality really means & they so often confuse spirituality with religion, I decided to devote a page to my definition of spirituality.

Before I continue, I must say that it would take forever to discuss all the aspects of spirituality & metaphysics, but I hope I covered the basics on this page.

The first part written below is my own definition.

The second part is something that was sent to me on the net & was so beautiful, I felt it summed up spirituality nicely & needed to be shared.

At the very least, I hope this helps you to think about yourself & your life.

I feel that if everyone started on their own spiritual journey, people would be a lot nicer, both towards themselves & to others.  This would then change the world, one person at a time, & society & earth as we know it, would be a much healthier & positive place to live.

Spirituality is the ONLY thing that gave me the answers I have been looking for my whole life. I know that if you have hope, the desire & you make the effort, your spiritual journey will help you too. :)

If you ever need any help, I am here for you, as most average people mock others who delve deep & look for the answers within. Consciously spiritually acting people need to stick together & help one another explore & grow, both in the good times & bad times. :)


If you already read Part One, please proceed to Part Two, although I have added things here that weren't on my other pages.

I am a spiritually conscious person. We all are spiritual humans as that is how we are born. The difference is, some people lose their consciousness of spirituality because of their parent's fears, what they are forced to learn in mainstream schools, by their mainstream religious affiliations and/or by their peers who aren't spiritually conscious.

I too eventually lost my spiritual consciousness because of my parents strict one-sided fanatical religious upbringing. The joy is that I regained it again when I was 28. I probably have my son to thank for that. His birth helped me to look at what was going on around me.

I had to finally face the fact that for a long time, my spiritual side was pleading for me to listen to her. Now I can openly say I'm an active participant in my own spiritual journey.

I have been studying spirituality for the last 11 years & actively participating in my spiritual growth for the last 5-6 years. For me it is a joy to learn about my spiritual self as well as the world around me & why things are the way they are. 

The basic premise behind spirituality is the ability to love & respect oneself. Unfortunately, this is not what society & religion generally teach us. We are usually taught to love & please others first, like our parents, elders, teachers, preachers, anyone who people consider of "importance" & the list goes on. We are also generally taught that this so called "god" everyone puts so much stock in, is here to run our lives. From that we gather that we really don't have control over our lives, someone or something else does.

For me there is no god that sits on a throne passing judgment on others. I also don't believe that god makes us happy if we pray to him all day & night. Look at how many people pray in a church or synagogue & still live miserable lives.

I don't believe that god gives us the answers. 

Spirituality has taught me that until a person truly learns how to love & respect themselves, they can't honestly love & respect anyone else. I feel that a lot of people think they are loving, but usually it's either dependency for security, it's filling a void of inner loneliness, someone has convinced themselves they love the other person because they were told to, or it can be gratitude. There can be many other reasons people mistaken other feelings for what we call love. The bottom line is, it's not true pure unconditional love and no matter how much of an act we put forth to others, we can't hide the REAL truth to ourselves even though we can spend our whole lives trying.

My whole life I've seen examples time & time again where people are not being their true authentic selves. Instead they live their lives for others whether it's their parents (long after their bodies have grown into the adult stage) or their partners.

I feel that in order to learn how to truly love & respect oneself, one must first have the interest & desire to do so & one can only do that after they admit they don't love & respect themselves. They can only admit it if they finally understand they are wasting their spiritual life when they don't love & respect themselves.

I say this because a lot of people feel that they don't deserve to love themselves or that it's conceited to love & respect oneself.

Finally after one wakes up & realizes this is the first step to living a healthy life & then they develop the desire to change, they need to learn how to go about making that change. Then lastly they need to take the tools they have learned & put them into action. Repetitious action produces results. Just talking about how spiritual we are without really living a spiritual life is blowing hot air, in my opinion. That's why one of my favorite sayings is... "actions speak louder than words".

Unlearning all the brainwashing our society, family & religion have engrained in us is not an easy task, especially if you've been living with the conditioning for 20-30+ years. Most people do not consider these control tactics brainwashing, but if you start feeling that you want to be free of the constraints that most people feel on a daily basis, just read a few new age/spiritual books. These books will eventually start detailing all the different areas you have control over in your life. At that point you will start to ask yourself why you don't have control over your own life. If you are honest enough with yourself, you will find that you allowed most other people in your life & even people who you perceive to have power, the opportunity & free rein to control you.

This is why I feel that most people just do as they are told, being led around by their noses.

Most people assume they have no free will, or they aren't given enough know how to control their lives.

While that may be true for some, there are plenty of people who are above average in intelligence that still allow others to control them.

I am not trying to put down average people as we need average & below average people in our lives. The whole world can not comprise of people who have above average intelligence. The world was not designed that way.

Saying all that, it doesn't mean that average or below average people don't have free will & the ability to control their lives.

Let's talk about good vs. evil. I & many other spiritual people don't believe that god decides whether we are good or bad.

I feel we have control over our actions. What I still have a problem accepting is that there needs to be bad in order to be good. Intellectually I understand this because there has to be balance in life, but from an emotional standpoint, it's hard for me to accept that we have to have bad in people. I'm not talking the occasional bad attitude, I'm talking really really unspiritually negative.

Actions - YOU are responsible for your own actions & NO ONE ELSE is. No matter how much you want to blame others for the decisions & actions you make & take in your life, that's just an easy safe way of not taking responsibility of your life. Please don't become a politician LOL

I didn't get it at first, but once I truly understood how life works, I realized they were right. No one can make me do anything I don't want to do.

If someone triggers me, that means I need to address that trigger. 

Once one gets to a higher level of spiritual growth, they can even stand to be around a very negative evil person & not let it affect them because they are so spiritually grounded in knowing they are a separate entity. They have learned & mastered the tools that allow the other person's energy to flow through them instead of stopping them dead in their tracks.

I look forward to the day when I get to that level. :)

Energy - yes we are all connected through energy & the life force of the universe. It shocked me when I finally got that science & spirituality are very closely linked. I could go on & on about energy & how we are all made up of energy, but unfortunately I don't have the time right now., but we are also directly responsible for controlling our life as we wish it to be played out. Just understand that your energy & mine are linked & when I have a negative thought, it directly affects you & your thoughts & your mood as well.

Here in lies why we are all connected. It starts with the life force (what most people call god) & made up of that life force is all the different energies on this earth. That is why we are all connected to that life force so, we could say we are all a part of god. Most humans are little gods running around not not really caring about our role in the universe. That is one of the reasons we are in a state of deflux right now. 

What would happen if you suddenly realized you had the power? Would you be able to handle it?

There is no fear of god, there is only fear of oneself. People who were more educated just wanted to control you (why not if you will believe them), so they just made up all these fear driven rules & tactics to keep you under their thumb.

Remember, so long as you doubt yourself, others will be able to control you & all you are doing is letting them.

Don't get me wrong, learning how to respect & love yourself doesn't happen overnight, I've been working on that part for years & will continue for years. Just remember, it's possible.

Connecting with ourselves is called our small infinite. Connecting with others & the universe is called the large infinite.  Giving up one or both of those connections hinders us greatly & does not make us a full spiritual conscious human being. The quickest most affective way to learn about yourself is through alternative courses. I call them therapy courses because they help us to get rid of our issues & connect with ourselves spiritually.

When I first started on my spiritual growth back in '92, I read a ton of books. Although I found it interesting, it didn't get to the core of the problem. I feel I could have healed a lot more quickly if I had taken these courses I later found out about.

The courses taught me why I have had such negative issues that were keeping me stuck in the past. Because I was stuck in the past, I couldn't move on with my life & living in the present.

People tend to either live in the past, or hope for the future.

Our society doesn't generally live & feel satisfied in the present.

Schools & marketing teach us we should want more more & more, that we are never good enough to be happy now.

I feel we should learn from the past, but never live in the past. Living in the future only makes a person dissatisfied with the present because they are always hoping something better will come along. You can never be satisfied if you always think you aren't good enough or what you have isn't enough. This will further validate you don't love & respect yourself.

I've also learned that not having any goals can be a hindrance. If we just stay in the present never being proactive, we wait for life to come to us, instead of living life & taking control.

We can have small goals to help us take steps to improve our present, but having these 5-10 year goals is ridiculous in my opinion. No one knows what's going to happen in 5-10 years nor should they be expected to know what is going to happen then.

Setting goals that are too demanding only puts pressure on ourselves to be better than we are now, further validating we aren't good enough. Our body isn't perfect, we aren't making enough money, our house isn't big enough, I am not smart enough & so on. 

Just think of it this way....

If you passed over (died) tomorrow, would you care what's going to happen in the future, or would you want to know what you had accomplished at that moment in time when you passed over?

Just to explain what I mean by issues, here are some I had in the past & some that still crop up from time to time...

abandonment, immaturity, blaming others for my life instead of learning how to take responsibility for my actions, I thought money was the key to happiness, I couldn't communicate to others how I was feeling inside because of fear, impatience, jealousy, never being satisfied with what I had, always trying to prove something to others, feeling insecure, unloved & not feeling whole as a person.

I have always been striving to make myself a better person & have managed to overcome the following...

I now love & respect myself way more then I ever did in my life. In fact, I have felt total peace quite a few times in the past 5 years & I know I will feel it again on a more frequent basis.  It is the most wonderful feeling I have ever felt. I can't describe it, you have to feel it internally. :) 

I have become more mature, I no longer blame others for my life because I take responsibility for my own actions, I've had money in the past & realized that money is not what life is all about although I still like having nice things that make my life comfortable & I still have that better then average taste I was unfortunately born with LOL. It does irk me that we have put ourselves into a situation where we have to have a lot of money just to have a roof over our heads & food on the table. I feel we are responsible for putting ourselves into that situation & we stress ourselves to death because we are always scrambling to survive. This is our first chakra imbalance.

I no longer care what others think of me whereas before I lived in fear that people wouldn't approve of me.

I learned it is not healthy to base one's self worth on other people's judgments as they don't control my life. Now I'm no longer out to impress others all the time.

When I'm spiritually grounded, I am way more patient then I ever was before. I also no longer have those deep pangs of jealousy that I used to have, most of my fears have diminished which allow me to be more open to new things, I compete with myself now instead of competing with others, I feel more secure with who I am, I am now able to communicate how I'm feeling & I listen much better then I used to before.  I consider myself a whole person, so although I feel we need others to help us in certain ways (remember we are all connected), I don't seek someone else to make me whole. I now seek someone to compliment me. :)

Spirituality is a journey that is fascinating, because just when you think you have all the answers, you learn you don't & you find out something new.

As you know, I believe that just saying you are spiritual is not enough.  I feel that if we aren't working on our spiritual self a lot of the time, we are just paying lip service to the word. I no longer say "all of the time" because I feel that puts too much pressure on people. Just like anything, we will fall off our spiritual path & months later, it will call us back again. 

I'm now finished with my part. I know I was a bit long winded, but I felt it was needed. I hadn't edited this page in a while, so I made sure I got to this on September 4, 2004.

I hope you got something out of this & I hope to speak to you again via e-mail or the phone. :)

I don't have time to proof-read this again, so if you find any errors, please e-mail them to me.

Thank you & have a good one :)



A time comes in your life when you finally get it ... when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!

Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and begin to look at the world through new eyes. This is your awakening. You realize it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change...or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon.

You come to terms with the fact that you are neither Prince Charming or Cinderella and that in the real world there aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you...and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are...and that's OK. They are entitled to their own views and opinions.

And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself...and in the process a sense of new found confidence is born of self- approval. You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected.

You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that it's not always about you.

So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself...and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties...and in the process a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you, is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche.

And you begin to sift through all the junk you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, how much you should weigh, what you should wear, what you should do for a living, how much money you should make, what you should drive, how and where you should live, who you should marry, the importance of having and raising children, and what you owe your parents, family, and friends.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for.

You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought in to begin with...and in the process you learn to go with your instincts.

You learn that there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life.

You learn that you don't know everything, and that it's not your job to save the world.

You learn to distinguish between guilt, responsibility, and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO.

You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love. How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be.

And you learn that alone does not mean lonely.

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs.

You learn that feelings are perfectly OK...and that it is your right to want things and to ask for the things you want...and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands.

You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity, respect, and you won't settle for less.

You learn that being tired fuels doubt, fear, and uncertainty and so you take more time to rest.

And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play.

You learn that, for the most part, you get in life what you believe you deserve...and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.


It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper

— Rod Serling

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Thank you so much for letting me know.

Last updated 03-Aug-08